Call the doctor because these burns are sick.
True story: One time I delivered a burn so sick, my friend received third-degree burns, had to be rushed to hospital immediately and remained there for 17 days. She had a massive love bite on her neck, so I said “Oh yeah, I heard there was a sale in Hickeys”.
The fact of the matter is that everyone needs a reserve of incredibly sick burns to win all future arguments that may arise. Usually, in the heat of the moment, your mind goes blank and you’re left stranded without a comeback. Not anymore. Simply save the below and use at your discretion.
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