Ciara writes features for JOE.co.uk and is doing her best.
Sorry who? Slow news day? Who cares? etc. Since the earth-shattering news broke that Bella Hadid and The Weeknd had split up, I haven’t had a moment of sleep. Add to that, the most recent news that Selena Gomez is now seeing The Weeknd, I’ve accepted that I might never feel the sensation of a good […]
‘That wind would cut you in half.’
Dry January is tough, but remember, you’re not alone. Every year, millions of us precious little snowflakes undertake the mammoth commitment to not go boozing during January. It’s a valiant decision, which deserves a large amount of recognition, perhaps on a global scale. While it’s a struggle to get through the month, it is possible. […]
This is a breaking news story. It was announced earlier today that an unnamed Irish teen has finally located his ‘dheinims dubha agus m’Umbro top’, after a lengthy and stressful search. Members of the public volunteered in a bid to help retrieve the items, which were said to be of extreme sentimental value to the […]
SpOoOoOoOoOoOoky. Ever find yourself wondering what you were in a former life? Oh. Just me then? Grand. Listen, regardless of how garbage you are in the present day, the fact of the matter is that we were all probably something even more garbage in a former life. I’m 90% sure I was a recycling bin, […]
Tá brón orm. Listen, as we’ve learned with Gaeilge puns, Irish is cool and very important in this cruel and unforgiving world. A cute little pastime that I believe we should all adopt is the banterful activity of translating celebrities’ names to Irish. Folks, spade a spade, there’s absolutely no reason to do this other than […]
Please can someone at Twitter just accidentally delete his account. Donald Trump is known for tweeting absolute garbage on a daily basis, and today was no exception. The latest victim is poor, sweet, angelic Meryl Streep. The FPOTUS (future President of the United States) has tweeted a substantial amount of nonsense in the past, so […]
Dancing With The Stars Ireland, it just rolls off the tongue. A concise 12 years after the programme first aired in the US, Ireland has wasted no time in catching up with the televisual productions of the United States. As with any Irish programme that requires celebrities, the nation braces itself for a large amount of Googling […]
Dad jokes are important. There’s very few pure things left in this cruel and unforgiving world, and certainly none even close to being as pure and precious as a Dad joke. As a strong advocate for ruining things, I’ve taken some Dad jokes and delivered the punchline using people’s names on Facebook. Enjoy. 1. A horse walks into […]
More like BORED games, am I right? Given that a large portion of us are currently undergoing the honourable struggle that is Dry January, it’s likely that our attention will turn to such possibilities as board games during these cold and dark winter evenings. But folks, where is the fun if there isn’t any flirting […]
Operation Preservation would be a far superior watch. The yearly inspiration that is Operation Transformation returned to our screens last night, encouraging us lazy sods to get up and moving, whilst gorging on the remains of the Christmas treats in a bid to ‘clear the house out’. It’s a great programme that definitely gets everyone at least thinking […]
Scars are cute. I’ve a load of scars from childhood stupidity and also from the time my friend Emma accidentally hit me with a hurley, leaving me with an eternally wonky eyebrow. Something about celebrities having visible scars fills me with comfort, as it reinforces my suspicions that they are just like you and I, only […]