Ciara writes features for JOE.co.uk and is doing her best.
Mars, am I right? (The planet, not the chocolate bar). It’s only a matter of time until we can all start moving to Mars. I can’t wait, but I’m concerned about what I should pack. After some extensive research and statistical analysis, here is what is likely to be waiting for us on Mars when […]
Oh, Twitter <3 The standard of tweets during March was through the roof. People were covering topics including but not limited to World Book Day, Easter, croissants and Paloma Faith. Standard. Here’s a selection of 25 sublime tweets that might have passed you by this month. #WorldBookDay Forgot they had to be in costume, so […]
Doctors hate her! Clickbait headlines are truly the scum of the Earth. If you catch wind of a life-changing trick that’s going to completely revolutionise how to pick your nose, something inside you is compelled into clicking and absorbing that information for future conversation pieces. We are animals. I’ve turned some popular films into clickbait […]
This will surely earn me a Pulitzer Prize. Imagine, just imagine if Twitter was around at the time of Jesus’ crucifixion. Let’s not fool ourselves, the memes would’ve been so dank, we would all be at serious risk of over-exposure to such hot takes even to this very day. The banter would be off the […]
The Apostles would’ve been ALL OVER WhatsApp. I’m going to go ahead and call bullshit on some blatant lies that are in the Bible. I firmly dispute the following: Jesus had twelve close friends when he was in his 30s He was able to organise 12 people together to go for dinner on a Thursday night They were […]
*sigh* Roddy Doyle. The Barrytown Trilogy is perfection, that is not up for discussion. However, Roddy has gotten awfully fond of a Facebook status (along with a stock image of two pints of Guinness) every time a celebrity death or something newsy happens. His heart is in the right place, but the necessity for these snippets […]
Justin Bieber has announced that he is cancelling all future meet and greets. He’s said that they leave him exhausted and ‘filled with so much of other people’s spiritual energy’. Ugh, nothing worse! I believe that the real reason is because he’s been forced to both meet and greet some particularly strange people recently. Having […]
School was class. It didn’t do a huge amount in terms of preparing us for the real world, but it was good fun. I have no idea how to pay taxes but by Christ do I remember the ‘-b’ formula. My favourite part about school was how serious the most mundane of things were treated, […]
Haircuts, am I right? They induce a large amount of anxiety in most of us, but unfortunately, like the letters I, F and E, they’re an essential part of life. Here’s 5 highly emotional stages you’ll find yourself going through when it’s time for a trim. STAGE 1: Booking Is there anything more stressful than […]
MSN was the Facebook of its day. I remember rushing home from school, waiting for the dial-up to connect and then sitting on MSN for hours talking utter nonsense with my friends. What a time to be alive! Here’s 6 types of conversations we were all guilty of having on MSN Messenger. 1. The Dead […]
The Pope is on Instagram! This comes as wonderful news because I can now FINALLY use the phrase ‘Eh… Is the Pope on Instagram?’ when someone asks a stupid question. It’s very likely that the Pope’s Instagram won’t actually be manned by him, but let’s pretend, for the sake of this article, that it is. […]
Interviews are hard. They’re stressful and induce far more nerves than they deserve to. Why should a quick chat about whether you’re suitable to work in a coffee shop result in a sleepless night, excessive sweating and a dose of the runs? I want to live in a world where you can be brutally honest […]